Hi Reader,This week's post comes from a few years ago, but it remains as important as ever. Thanks for reading! The Importance of Connection Photo: Read on the Blog I write a lot about self-differentiation. That may make it seem that it’s all about self. But there are two components to self-differentiation. One is self-definition, which is the ability to express what you believe in healthy ways. The other is emotional connection. Self-differentiation is the ability to self-define while...
10 days ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,This week's post shows that high achievers are not immune to "comparisonitis." Perhaps that's what drives their achievement in the first place, but it's not a healthy way to live. Let me know what you think. How Do You Define Yourself? Photo: iLixe48 Read on the Blog Two of my favorite authors are Adam Grant and Simon Sinek. I have recommended their books on my Two for Tuesday emails. I find them insightful, innovative and compelling. I believe their work has made me a better...
17 days ago • 2 min read
Hi Reader,This week's newsletter is full of family systems material. I hope you find it helpful. Thanks for reading. Four Permissions to Give Yourself (and Others) Photo: make Read on the Blog I once ran a leadership program led by Bill Selby, founder of the Center for Pastoral Effectiveness of the Rockies. At the beginning he counseled participants to give themselves four permissions. They are great guidelines for how to handle yourself, as well as treat others. Permission to say “No” This...
24 days ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,This week I share my thoughts on the political mess that we find our world in. Let me know what you think. The Need for Non-Anxious Leaders Is Greater than Ever Photo: iStock Photos Read on the Blog The recent blow up in the Oval Office between Donald Trump and Volodymyr Zelensky got me thinking. Effective leaders say what they believe, while giving others the freedom to disagree. This is needed now, more than ever. This is certainly true in political discourse. What was once a...
about 1 month ago • 2 min read
Hi Reader,Starting this week, each Two for Tuesday Newsletter will include a section where you can support my work for $5 a month or more (see below). Over time, this will enable me to hire more help, as well as spend more time creating content. This newsletter will continue to be free, so any help you can provide is appreciated. Three Principles that Guide My Work Photo: Arvebettum Read on the Blog I wrote my first blog post in 2016. My first podcast episode dropped in 2019. I’ll admit I had...
about 1 month ago • 2 min read
Hi Reader,Making an impact takes time. The average overnight success takes 10 years. This week's newsletter shares ideas that have helped me. It's never too late to start. As Confucious said, "The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The next best time is today." Three Time Management Principles that Changed My Life Photo: orebrik Read on the Blog Life-changing is a pretty strong term. But it’s true. I am not a list person. I don’t get any special satisfaction from checking off items on...
about 1 month ago • 4 min read
Hi Reader, The Importance of Family Position Photo: Depositphotos Read on the Blog Have you ever wondered why you always seem to play the same role in your family, no matter how much you try to change? In the last post I mentioned that your position in your family of origin is important. I don’t mean sibling position, although both Murray Bowen and Edwin Friedman considered this to be an important factor in functioning. However, some think that sibling position as a determinant of functioning...
about 2 months ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,This week's post is a reminder that when you get frustrated with people, look at the systems in which they function. It has more to do with it than you think. A Tale of Two Systems Photo: eskaylim via yayimages Read on the Blog In two consecutive days, I had back-to-back experiences with Motor Vehicle and a large bank. Which do you think was worse? It wasn't what I expected. Both experiences were related to my work as the executor of a family member's estate. One task was to...
about 2 months ago • 3 min read
Hi Reader,This week's post is a reminder to think through how you respond to a given situation to get clear on the forces that influence your actions. When you do this, you're able to show up as your best self more often. Let me know what you think. The Stories We Tell Ourselves Photo: VectorThings Read on the Blog I once went for a long run on a brutally hot morning. The temperature was already 80°. Many organized running events will cancel if the start time temperature is above 80°. A few...
2 months ago • 3 min read